16 January 2023
I’m sitting in a car waiting outside of a bar.
Suddenly, the passenger side back tire goes, “pop!”
I get out and see that the tire has a hole in the side as big around as my finger.
Tony comes over and, in his thick New York gangster accent, says, “Let’s get this around back and have my boy fix this for you.”
We drive around the back, where there is a small garage.
The mechanic says, “Twenty dollars gets you a new tire. One hundred dollars gets you all four, plus making sure the guy that did this won’t ever bother you again.”
“What! Are you going to kill him?”
“No. We’ll just take his new tires and tell him he would do well to leave you alone.”
“Okay,” I say. “Let’s go that route.”
Tony comes around to check on things and says, “You wanna hear a joke?”
I say, “Sure.”
“So why did the chicken cross the road?”
“To get to the other side?” I ask.
“No.” And in his thick New York gangster accent, he says, “Because I f**king told it to!” He bursts out laughing.
I wake up